Asleep At The Wheel of Life?

I’ve been asleep at the wheel. 


In the past, I’ve lived this life without directing it. I have gone with the flow. I have tried to fully experience it, sure– but I have gone without being in the driver’s seat for long periods of time. 

In fact, it felt like my efforts at steering the car have been exclusively in times of crisis, like I would reach across the center console and grab the wheel to swerve out of oncoming traffic. But then I go back to the passenger seat. 

Of course, it’s hard to get anywhere when you don’t know where you are going. It’s easier to sit in the passenger seat and just let someone else do the decision making. But when I’ve had a destination, I have no problem driving. 

I drove to the destination of graduating college.

I drove to the destination of finding full time, meaningful work.

I drove to the destination of publishing my book.

Now, I am driving to the destination of growing my relationship coaching practice. 

I know, when I reach that destination, I don’t want to idle in the parking lot while I figure out what is next. I am working on those next destinations now. I think about those BIG questions. 

Big questions like, what do I want my legacy to be? 

To answer that question, I search for inspiring questions. An art teacher once told me that creativity requires boundaries. The tighter the boundaries and rules, the more your creativity can flourish and work. Asking about my legacy is such a big question, that I needed to put more constraint on what I would enjoy and have the capability of doing.

Here are some of the questions that I have used. I hope that some of them shed some light on what you want out of life. Clearly, I haven’t figured it all out yet, but I’m a little closer today than I was yesterday. 

What makes you forget to eat and poop?

Mark Manson

Does this support the life I am trying to create?

Madelyn Moon

What would you want if anything were possible for you, if it were guaranteed to happen, if life were working with you, if not one would be mad at you, and if you couldn’t f* it up?

Amanda Frances

I feel the most like me when: __________ 

Julie Parker

How can you look at this differently?

Whitney Oppenhuizen

What do I need to let go of to be who I truly am?

Danielle LaPorte

My belief in the power of good questions is part of what drew me to coaching. I have had moments of my own confusion and darkness that have been flipped by one good question. 

Do you have a favorite question? 

Photo by Samuel Silitonga on

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